WHO YOU CALLIN’ A BITCH!?…….YOU. BITCH!

It’s no secret that I am a fan of the black woman. I became one of y’all’s number one supporters when my Mom and Dad split and I saw what it took to keep our family tight and prospering. In my opinion y’all are the shit. I was raised, mostly, by strong black women, who had class, integrity and all the traits that lead the Gods’ to label y’all Wisdoms and Earths. I have dated exclusively on our side of the fence and after many a relationship married a, what I call, Blackety-Black-Black-BlackAss woman. I am enjoying being a new father to our offspring, my Blackety-Black-Black-BlackAss 18 mo. daughter. I’ve worked at BET, Radio One and TV ONE with some extra fine, gorgeous, even enticing women without ever crossing the colleague/’ jumpoff at work’ line. I pump Jill, Phyllis, Billie, Sade, Aretha, Mary and Erykah religiously.  I believe Nona Gaye’s face is the face envisioned as some ancient deity in some ancient civilization.  In other words I love me some y’all.

With that said I also recognize a bitch when I see one. I don’t know if y’all know it or not but there are way more bitches and hoes these days. While collectively you all have put up a very nice front and lead us to believe that you are all virtuous sisters, deserving of nothing short of our utmost respect and consideration, the evidence is overwhelming that the number of so-called bitches and hoes among you is staggering! Before you all start with the “No he di’nts” let me clarify what I mean by bitches and hoes. Bitches and hoes, in my humble opinion, are those low class, loud and wrong, overconfident, underachieving, unaware, selfish, backwards, know-not-what-they-not-know ass women and the women who condone and celebrate them.

So let me get to the point of this little piece. BASKETBALL WIVES!!!!!!! OMG……SMH……GTFOOH!!!!!! This is some bullshit if I’ve ever seen it. You all should be ashamed of yourselves for allowing the black woman to portray the black woman in such a way on a national level. It is horrible watching you watch this train wreck week in and week out. The worse. Then, once you all get together and start the discussion it is even worse (r). How you dissect each and every piece of bitch and hoe minutia is appalling. How you recognize that Shawni is pimping the situation and are cool with that is sad and disgusting. How you watch them base their relationships on superficial nothingness but root for them as “real wives”  or girlfriends or whateverthefuck, turns my intellectual stomach. Then when they added Tammi…..well Damn! I kinda know Tammi from working out here in LA and I have known David Edwards since my college days and what went down on “The Real World” was fucked up. Foreal.  And it has had long reaching repercussions ,‘cause, in my wife’s girlfriend’s words, “She a hot mess!” With that said I don’t get any pleasure from a show that puts her in close proximity with a woman who slept with her then husband, introduces the transgression in front of a national audience and then let’s her know she was of no consequence. I get less pleasure in the “fuck you bitch”/”whatever bitch” argument that ensues and the catfight shortly thereafter.  It’s horrible. Matter of fact to say it’s horrible is an understatement. It’s a base of horrible baked with a huge heaping helping of horrible piled on top with sprinkles of horrible in a warm horrible style vinaigrette!

These same sentiments go for “Atlanta Housewives” and “Love and Hip-Hop” too.

Now I wouldn’t have a thing to say about it if you all didn’t make such a stink about rap lyrics and how the black woman is portrayed in the media.  When Imus called them nappy headed sisters nappy headed hoes the uproar was unanimous and swift. Everyman who ever listened to a rap song was under suspicion for being a woman hating chauvinist pig and I for one did a bunch of extra foot massaging and household chores to keep the peace. It was crazy how y’all went through the emotional motions with this and forgot that one of the most powerful people in entertainment was a black woman, Condolezza Rice was the Secretary of State and Michelle Obama was gearing up to put Barak’s black- lipped ass in office. Y’all came out against Lil Wayne and Gucci. Y’all prompted Al Sharpton to spearhead a new national discussion on rap lyrics and imagery and got on the ‘sisters is the shit train’ at every “For Sister’s Only” celebration and “The Princess and the Frog” premier. Y’all flexed muscle and made the world take notice.

Then.

You played yourselves with this new round of foolishness.

What’s goin’ on ma? Are y’all y’all anymore? Is this the television equivalent of comfort/junk food for ya? Is it just a guilty little pleasure? What? I don’t get it. I thought you were way too above this to give it any of your time. I’m still caught up on the many renditions of “Phenomenal Woman” I’ve had impressed upon me throughout the years. Is it that we’ve finally reached the point where what a few do doesn’t affect the masses? (“That’s them bitches. That I ain’t got shit to do with me and mine. Now take the trash out for me please.”  In my wife’s voice)What? Am I just being hyper sensitive and overreacting? I need to know. I really believed that you all were above this garbage. I’ve been going to bat for sisterdom. My mans has labeled me Captain-Save-‘Em-All-Day! Suggesting that I am nothing more than a rest haven for hoes.  Saying that all I believed to be true about my sisters is wrong and tainted with the stench of a grand lie perpetually perpetrated upon unsuspecting squares such as myself. Holla Back.

 On a side note when me and my most beloved supremely exalted wife and I are in the car together, listening to real raw rap music (shade45/hiphopnation) is frowned upon because of how offensive it is to her highnesses delicate sensibilities. She’s from Baltimore City proper and has never heard such filth in all her years.

GTFOOH!

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